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« He's not mine | Main | The rest of the way »

June 13, 2006

Comments

Shelba

This must be a tough call to make, especially when you don't know what is going to happen w/ China. Good luck with this.

Orodemniades

Wow...I don't know what I would do in your situation. I know things will work out for the best, however, no matter which country you go for.

Debberoo

For what its worth, I think you have fallen into the trap of thinking there is a way to predict the unpredictable.

Honestly, you can not control the time frame no matter the country. Things change continually in all the sending countries.

It doesn't make any difference whether China sends up to June 20, June 30 or July 30 at this stage of the game that is absolutely no indicator of when YOUR referral would arrive. Ask the families that started when referrals were taking 14 months and then scrambled when they got referral at 6 months or the families that started when it was taking 6 months and ended up waiting 12 months.

Between now and your referral, China could suddenly swing back to 6 months or stretch out to 18 or close and you know the exact same thing is true for Guatemala or Ethopia or Russia or anywhere.

The only sure way to have any control over the timeframe is to send your application in to a country - any country, you gotta get in the line and then no backward glances. Truely ALL ROADS lead directly to your daughter or son just get on the road.

p.s Hope that didn't sound harsh it absolutely wasn't meant in that way at all and yes I know that you can't get inline till you have all the paperwork but even that will go faster once you pick a country and jump :) .


jeanette1ca2004

I can think up a dozen other scenarios that would require you to leave a child for some period of time, and you know what? Kids adjust. Maybe it's not pefect, but better a year from now to be struggling with the issues involved in raising 2 kids, than with the issue of still being in limbo waiting for bureaucracies to get around to you. Kids don't need perfect families or perfect lives. They need people who will love them unconditionally and do the best they can to nurture and guide them. Take a deep breath and if your heart pulls you to both China and Guatamala, then go for both!

Jenny

You'll get there. You will. And I think 2 might be hard but hey, people have twins. It is a personal decision, for you and your husband.

Oh and my agency does guat. I guess they are pretty good at it, it is their most popular program and man the babies I met...perfect.

Tera

Hi there. I know of several families right now who are adopting more than one baby at one time...not from Guat and China but from Guat. I am not sure if China is okay with being in another adoption process while you are in their process. But, nevertheless, only YOU can decide if you can take care of two babies at one time. That is your decision alone and a social worker cannot dictate to you whether or not you can physically/mentally care for two babies at once. Like I said, there are SEVERAL families on the Guat boards who are adopting two unrelated babies at the same time...not all countries will let you do that. It is a hard decision to make. We did decide to go with Guat instead of China...either program is good...you almost cannot make a wrong decision. God bless.

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